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    Guilty Pleasure Edition: Eurovision

     Posted in The Arts at 4:02 on Tuesday, March 13th, 2012 by Mr. Rant

    I thought I would write something about the Eurovision, it’s a guilty pleasure of mine and never fails to raise a smile to these fetted, decayed old lips.

    Often, the reason is because I’m taking the piss out of it, whilst watching but often it’s just down to the pure campness and silliness, it’s just amazing, lets face it where else to you get Ukranian’s dancing around in crazy hats or twins that you’d quite like to kill (Jedward).

    We’re starting the long road to Eurovision 2012, and it starts here, yes the UK has announced that we’ll have Engelbert Humperdinck representing us, lets see how we get on with that!


    Update Status: Never Updated.

      Written By Mr. Rant.

    We Will Rock You… (Birmingham)

     Posted in Reviewed & The Arts at 23:58 on Tuesday, August 25th, 2009 by Mr. Rant


    I expected that the musical written by Ben Elton would give everyone: A Kind of Magic and put everyone Under Pressure to enjoy the production until the hammer fell, alas the production didn’t.  As with most large scale productions there is a certain amount of pre-reviewing done by people who have seen the production before you.  I had heard everything about the show; good and bad.  Desperately trying to enter the theatre with a clear head and no pre-conceived ideas.  I managed it.  I sat waiting for the audience to settle down and for the show to begin.

    It did and a minute later was stopped by a major technical fault – you cannot make a review on a technical error so once again the slate was clean and the show started again after a break of about five minutes.  Once the scenery and flats were reset and the lighting had cycled back through the cues – the excitement in the crowd erupted as round two started with the infamous ‘Innuendo’.

    The lights circled the stage and the audience was lit with a bright white strobe light that shocked the crowd at the very beginning.  Kevin Kennedy was AWOL so the wonderfully welsh Pop played by Mathew Craig took to the stage.  A short introduction ensued and the show was well on it’s way.  From the outset I was somewhat bewildered by the staging, a short flight of steps with a hideously obvious video wall hung ludicrously over the stairs.  The ‘GaGa Girls’ opened with the first of twenty-four Queen songs; Radio GaGa – think prep girls or Alicia Silverstone and you get the idea of what they looked like; although I think the majority of men in the audience rather liked their outfits; clad as they were in short-shorts and high riding skirts.

    After their short and enthralling* song and dance enter our ‘black sheep’; Galileo who is promptly arrested for being free thinking and a dreamer: played well by Alex Gaumond – the arresting officer is Jonathan Wilkes – who is good but not that special.

    Sarah French-Ellis plays Scaramouche.

    Sarah French-Ellis plays Scaramouche.

    My top of the pops for this production is the ‘goth’ character Scaramouche played by the fabulous and stunning Sarah French-Ellis – I honestly think that she is one of the finest stage actresses I have seen in the a touring production: funny and exciting to watch she really is the full ticket.

    The show in typical musical style bumbles along introducing characters at a rate of knots that you can’t possibly remember at the time, frankly I spent the majority of the show and the time after saying I like that ‘whatshisname’ or she was good as that queen person.
    Elton doesn’t entirely make it a whirlwind production though.  You can understand the draw of the show, of course it’s about one of the finest bands that ever lived.  I think if you like a silly show; yes I am speaking directly to the Mamma Mia fans here; you will love it but if you like a strong and sustained three hours of entertainment you will leave feeling a little frustrated.

    I have to give full credit to the cast; they were fantastic, my adoration for them is high but it is not for the story, it’s weak, lulling and about as much fun as watching Aston Villa playing Liverpool.

    The show runs in Birmingham until 12th September 2009 and tickets are available by following this link.

    I have lots more to say about this but alas it is late and my eyes are closing; stayed tuned for Hippodrome Hitlers and the picture Nazis.

    *It was enthralling due to flashes of underwear that were readily visible, which was nice…

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    Update Status: Modified at: 11:53, on August 31st, 2009.

      Written By Mr. Rant.

    RP- WoE Reviewed

     Posted in The Arts at 18:01 on Tuesday, April 7th, 2009 by Kris

    Reposting this in an effore to deter you from seeing it. Read at: WoE review.

    Update Status: Never Updated.

      Written By Kris.

    The Witches of Eastwick – Reviewed….

     Posted in Reviewed & The Arts at 23:30 on Monday, April 6th, 2009 by Mr. Rant

    The much anticipated UK tour of The Witches of Eastwick opened at Birmingham’s Hippodrome Theatre this evening; and to say there wasn’t anticipation over this production would be an understatement.  The air of excitement filling the auditorium was palpable; I got the feeling that the cast was the reason the excitement prevailed.

    Marti Pellow playing the devil being the reason that almost ninety percent of the audience were former Wet, Wet, Wet fans.  The show opened in standard expectation with the overture leading us into sound problems; the mix was off and the actress on stage could not be heard.  The cheap American accents added to the inaudability of the actors, it seems to be that the show was either under rehearsed or just not rehearsed this can be said of Pellow at least.  The supporting cast was able to carry the dancing and high movement light entertainment which Witches provides.

    The dancers were good, the sets were good, the lighting was good; the show was average at best.  Not for a moment were you transported by Pellows’ performance; at one point it was impossible to understand him as his accent wavered from deep south American to deep north Glasgow.  His sexual movements allowed his fans to shout, woop and whistle but for the average theatre goer did nothing but put them off.

    It comes to something to hear a sound technician speak during a show confessing his dislike of the production in three simple words:

    “This is shit”

    My sentiments exactly.  Witches is weak the story line is poor and Pellow is foolish in his role.  Wincing while watching a show isn’t something I like to do during a performance but this was the only way to cope with his outlandish and boring performance.  It really was embarrassing to watch.

    Verdict: If you like Marti Pellow and a bit of music then it’s worth seeing.  However, if you’re an avid theatre lover don’t bother, it’s a waste of three hours and rarely raises a smile.

    The Witches of Eastwick is on all this week at Birmingham Hippodrome.

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      Written By Mr. Rant.

    The problem is..

     Posted in Public Information & The Arts at 5:41 on Sunday, March 22nd, 2009 by Mr. Rant

    You’re stupid.  Over the past few days the silliness of people has hit me like a train.  We’re getting dumber.  It would seem at an alarming rate.  Gone are the days that we could all string together an intelligible sentence and gone are the days that people read for recreation.  I love to read; anything in fact.  I love to peruse a book with a nice cup of coffee preferably in a Starbucks.  (I’m going for sponsorship by name dropping; or at least a free cappuccino).

    I think people really need to start to read again.  There are so many wonderful books to read out there and that they’re not even expensive, you can even get them free from this place called a library; you have t0 return them though.  Last week I was on the train taking one of my usual jaunts down to Cheltenham.  Just a few months ago you would see scores of people reading on the train enjoying the brief moment of downtime before their lives started up again in a raucous fashion.  On this train journey there was none of that.  Just a carriage full of nothing.  People staring blankly into the distance as the train sped on it’s journey through the country side.

    I like to see people reading.  It gives me faith that the human race is not in a slow decline into nothingness.  I beg of you please get a book and read it.  Enjoy it.  Make the pictures in your head as you read the words on the page.

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      Written By Mr. Rant.

    Car Crash Television..

     Posted in Anger Level 4 & The Arts at 20:25 on Wednesday, December 3rd, 2008 by Mr. Rant

    I think the reason behind the popularity of certain programmes on television is justified by the above statement, it’s been developing for sometime and over Christmas it’s twenty-thousand times worse than ever.  Christmas T.V used to be for me; a thing of magic and pure entertainment, but these days that seems to have dwindled down to a hotch-potch of light-entertainment and pure dross.

    X-Factor – this doesn’t really need summing up it’s really not my cup of tea, it’s car crash television at it’s best, well it’s not quite the pinnacle of disgust that trophy is loftily held by I’m a celebrity get me out of here.  Consisting of nothing but a group of mindless z-Listers partaking in a popularity contest.

    I mean who really wants to see some Muppet prancing around wearing shorts and a vest, at 3am in the morning because they’re scared of being attacked by a rouge mouse?  It would seem that the majority of the population would, I’m not usually a violent person but if you’re into these mindless programmes you really should be strung up by your eyebrows and whipped with a leek, preferably with some cheese sauce on top of tip of it.  That would be a good punishment.

    But alas this cannot be, it seems that there’s an inherent attraction to these programmes and this doesn’t look likely to change, if I had my way it would.  When I come to power; I’m going to outlaw these programmes and replace them instead with a live televised showing of people being whipped with leeks and cheese.

    This would seem to be a fettish of mine.

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      Written By Mr. Rant.